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  • Writer's pictureKim Colman

SOLVE VERSUS SUPPORT

I have had many clients seek my help feeling totally overwhelmed and stressed out when they can see that things are taking place concerning their close friends or family members.

They can see that these people close to them are going through emotional hard times. This can be as a result from:-

  1. Relationship problems

  2. Complicated divorce issues

  3. Custody battles with children

  4. Loss of employment

  5. Work related problems

  6. The loss of a loved one

When we see someone, especially if they are close to us, we empathise with them, and often want to jump in and try to help them solve this issue that is causing them so much stress and upset.

I get you, as this is absolutely how I am, but over the years I have learnt to offer SUPPORT rather than to SOLVE.

SOLVE – When you try to solve someone else’s problems, one must remember that you are thinking and acting from your perspective or values and not theirs

SUPPORT – When you support someone, you give then a life line or a listening ear and allow them to learn and grow.

When I find myself in situations like this, I always need to remind myself, that this is “Their Business” and not mine. I can’t solve it for them, but will support and listen.

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